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Andy’s Blues Blog

ST.ANDREWS SCHOOL OF FOOTBALL

18-05-2010

Head Teacher Andy Munro offers his end of term report – with marks out of ten.

JOE HART;9 – just misses out on the perfect 10 for a slightly shaky settling in period at his new school and his unerring ability to kick the ball diagonally…if only it was Roger Willis on the wing and not McFaddie!

MAIK TAYLOR;6 – professional attitude but keeps making the same mistakes…too old to learn now.

STEPHEN CARR;8 - under normal circumstances should have left school at his age. Yet as a senior prefect, he led by example and was only fleetingly shown up by the nippers from Man City.

LIAM RIDGEWELL;9 – he used to play at Aston Manor and he’s been played out of position so things couldn’t normally be worse…yet Liam has had a wonderful year and has at times looked more dangerous in the opposing box than our forwards(which to be fair wouldn’t be hard).

ROGER JOHNSTON;9 – led his classmates by example...a colossus in both heading and tackling and if he played for West Ham, he would already be in the England squad.

SCOTT DANN;8 – improved immeasurably after a shaky injury prone start. Still gets distracted in class but generally a very solid performer.

CRAIG GARDNER;7 – another one to switch schools(and some say allegiances) but has already shown high energy and great commitment to the cause.

BARRY FERGUSON;9 – the School Governors were undecided whether to accept his application when he came to Stans but he guards the ball like a Scotsman guards his wallet – supremely comfortable in possession and has kept the pressure off the defence without the luxury of a forward who can hold up the ball.

LEE BOWYER;8 – often suspended from class for bad behaviour, he is now a role model and may be made a prefect. As dangerous in the box as he used to be on the streets.

JAMES MCFADDEN;7 – is he a bird? Is he a plane? Is he a forward? Or is he a Midfielder? James is the most talented boy in the class but suffers from an identity crisis.

CHUCHO BENITEZ;7 – not long out of primary school and is always running around helping other people…but should he be playing with the big boys?

CAMERON JEROME;7 – it’s the first time for ages that he’s had to count to ten but he should have learnt to count to 20 by now. Fastest boy in the class.

STUART PARNABY;6 – always calling in sick but when he turned up he acquitted himself well. Soldiers on loyally not like Matty Upson who left class in disgrace.

KEITH FAHY;7 – showed flashes of talent but always wanted to be in the centre of things instead of sitting at a desk by the door.

LEE CARSLEY5; - Lee ended up being the classroom monitor and not likely to be around next year.

SEB LARSSON;7 – Seb thinks that he is better than he is even when he went off the boil on his best subject ‘dead ball kicking’. Still a hard worker and likely to be in class next year.

FRANC QUEUDRUE;5 – as our French teacher would say…au revoire mon ami..merci pour les memoires.

DAVID MURPHY;5 only played for the school second string and even then showed he is one of the main reasons footballing truant Jermaine Pennant wants to get back to playing in the Premiership.

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